the speedway and section a.

this past weekend rooms and i drove to charlotte for a weekend of high alcohol intake and the nascar race at lowes saturday night.  we had gotten about 12 people on board for the race and were stoked.  we hadn’t been to a race together since we worked them as miller girls 2 years ago.  what could be better than be surrounded by real honest to god mullets and moonshine.  plus… where else can you wear fake ugly teeth and not necessarily be looked at twice…

we kicked off the weekend at suite downtown.  and mind you.  i was unaware that place had gogo dancers on the bars.  so i walk in sober to a place where booties are shaking over my head at all times.  i was immediately peer pressured into red bull vodkas ( and as you all know i don’t drink vodka… considering it made me punch a bouncer in the face once)  three red bull and vodkas, jagerbombs, and a few soco and limes later, and we were on the dance floor.  the place was so much freaking fun.  we didn’t even make it to whiskey river… and yes. i’m aware that would have been amazing being its dale jr’s bar the night before a huge race.  however, my drunk ass failed to remember to make us all go there till it was too late.

we walked outside around 2 to meet up with some friends and headed to fuel pizza, where i bought a large cheese pizza that looked like a small. watched one of my friends flash the pizza maker for free garlic knots and realized my life is probably eerily similiar to a nascar race even when i’m not at one.

we drove home and rediscovered the amazingness of guitar hero.  (and no the cops were not called to the townhouse this time due to our “rocking too hard.”)  rooms and i sang backup for the boyfriend until 5am.  and by backup we mean we jumped around the couches singing into remote controls when the two words of the  song we actually knew were played.  (yes i’m 24…and not 12)

we woke up at 10 and got ready for the race.  i put on the jorts and knee high tube socks.  threw on a tank top and the amazing hoodie i discovered in the little boys section of wal mart.  which zips all the way down over your face and makes you look like you’re wearing a racing helmet.  complete with cutouts for your eyes and mouth.  ( i know… greatest 15 bucks ever spent!!!)  rooms looked like the biggest kurt busch fan ever. and the boyfriend rocked short little cut off jean shorts, a cut off yellow nascar shirt, camo hat, tube socks, and shoes that looked like they were meant to be worn in a game of basketball in the 70’s.  ( needless to say he looked amazing)  and we were off to go the grocery store dressed like idiots.  180 dollars later we met up with the group.  each assigned ourselves a set of fake teeth and halloween goblets.  crammed into the cars and headed off. 

and wow.  was it amazing.  nascar gets better every year i think.  asides from our entire group looking like idiots.  one guy wearing only american flag boxers and a camo shirt.  we were a huge shitshow.  everyone around us actually asked us not to leave to go the race.  (although they might have meant that sarcastically…)  we had so much fun.

 from pretending that the straw to a drink was a microphone.  to busting our asses doing cartwheels.  to sticking the ripped off end of a foam finger in someones boxers to make it look like…well you get the picture.  we had the girl who looked like she fell off the rock of love cast.  to the girl whose overall jumper barely covered her ass.  to the one that had nacho cheese in her hair.  we were amazing.  there are pictures of boys proposing to girls as they hang off of RV ladders.  of us stealing the peanuts of innocent bystanders sitting in front of us.  of our faces amazed at made up car crashes. and one with a man decorated entirely in american flags and literally holding 71 little american flags… who called himself mr. america. 

we watched 344 laps of nascar amazingness.  ate corn dogs. lost people. found people.  tried to get rid of people.  had people get kicked out.  got made fun of by people. made fun of people.  lost one ticket. 3 coolers, and countless brain cells.

all in all.

next year’s sign up sheet is available.  hurry up.  before we let someone else wear your fake teeth and rock the jorts you wanted.